Just a HandMeDown Ford
by completewithtypos
Summary: Clarisse is stressed, and Joe helps, with a little resistance along the way.


Just a Hand-Me-Down Ford

Charlotte entered Clarisse's office with yet another stack of papers. It seemed everyone was working in overdrive today, and documents were coming from all over Europe to be looked over and signed by Clarisse.

"Charlotte, why isn't that pile getting any smaller?" Clarisse asked wearily.

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty, it seems that everyone is demanding your attention today."

Clarisse sighed heavily as she moved another paper over to the 'finished' pile. "Do you remember what a vacation is, Charlotte?"

"I think I had one once." Charlotte smiled, "And I know that we could both use one right about now."

"Thank you, Charlotte. Why don't you go get something for lunch. I'll be all right on my own for awhile." Clarisse suggested.

"What about you? You can't skip lunch, Your Majesty."

"I'll be all right, dear." She replied.

However, it turned out that Charlotte was right. She shouldn't have skipped lunch. Being over-worked and hungry made her grow increasingly irritable as the afternoon wore on. The staff went scurrying in every direction; the wrath of Clarisse was not something you wanted directed at you. Olivia was scolded for not bringing the tea hot enough. Lionel shrank into a corner, after being told that he was too loud.

"Charlotte can't I finish one document before you bring me six more?" Clarisse exclaimed harshly.

Charlotte murmured her apologies, and fled the room. She went straight to the security room to find Joe. He wasn't there, but Shades said that he went for a walk in the garden. Thanking him, Charlotte hurried outside, quickly catching up to him.

"Joe!" she called.

"Hello, Charlotte. What's the matter?" he asked, seeing her harassed expression.

"You've got do something about the Queen." She said, and his face immediately filled with anxiety.

"What's wrong? Is she all right?" he demanded.

"Oh, she's all right, it's every one else who's wrong." Charlotte said sarcastically, then continued. "She's over-worked, and stressed, she didn't eat lunch, and frankly Joe, she's driving us all nuts!"

Joseph laughed. "All right, I'll give it my best shot. But if she maims me, I'm coming after you."

"Okay, deal." Charlotte said.

"You'll tell the kitchen not to worry about dinner won't you?" he said, his eyes twinkling.

"What are you plotting?" Charlotte asked, feeling better already. If anyone could calm down Clarisse it was Joseph.

"A surprise." Joseph said mischievously turning to go back into the palace. Charlotte sighed. She obviously wasn't going to get details, however just getting the Queen out of her hair was enough.

Joseph trotted up the stairs to his room to make a phone call, grab some money, and a set of car keys. He stopped in the security room to inform Shades that he was taking the Queen out for awhile, and they'd be back later. Finally, Joseph made his way to her office. The hallway leading up to it was deserted and Joe smiled to himself. She must have scared off all the staff. He quietly entered the room and found her staring out the window. He made a mental note to himself that it was rapidly nearing sunset and they would have to get moving if his plan was to succeed.

"Hello, darling." He said crossing the room towards her.

Clarisse jumped and stared at him for a moment before returning to her paperwork. "not now, Joseph, please." She said, her words coming out more angry than she'd meant them. She was irritated that she'd been caught daydreaming.

"Clarisse, you need to take a break." He said, moving to stand behind her, gently massaging the tense muscles in her shoulders.

"No, Joseph I have to do this. It needs to be done."

"yes, but tonight?" asked, leaving her side to stand by the window. "It's such a lovely night." He mused. Try as she might to suppress the urge, she was compelled to get up and stand beside him at the window. "Good, I'm glad I changed your mind. Come on," he said tugging on her hand, like an impatient child. Any other day it would have made her laugh.

"Joseph, you haven't changed my mind. I'm staying right here and finishing this, now please go. I'll see you tomorrow." She told him, feeling guilty about shrugging him off.

"Then I guess I'll have to use force." He said, and before she could question him, he'd scooped her up into his arms and was heading towards the door.

"Joseph! Put me down! Joseph, I am in no mood for this, put me down this instant! I have very important work to do!"

"More important than you're health? I know for a fact that thus far you've skipped two meals today. Let's not make it three."

She stopped talking for a moment, staring at him in shock and more than slight annoyance, then continued in her tirade. "I am completely serious about this, Joseph! Do I have to order you to put me down? Because if I do, then you can be sure that you won't have a job tomorrow!"

Joseph's step faltered for a moment. Perhaps he had crossed the line. Then, he decided that this was for her own good and kept going. He came to a stop outside her suite and motioned for a very surprised guard to open the door for them. Once inside, he set her down on her feet and told her, "Go change into something comfortable and casual."

"Joseph, what is the meaning of this?" she asked.

"Just do it. It'll be fun, I promise. Please, Clarisse?" he stood in front of the door to block her exit. Seeing that going along with it was her only option Clarisse stalked into her closet to find something to wear.

"How casual?" she called out to him.

"I don't suppose you own a pair of jeans?" he asked, only half-joking.

"No, but will these do?" she asked, returning in a pair of soft brown corduroy pants, carrying a cable-knit sweater.

"Perfect." Joseph smiled. She still looked regal.

"Well come on, then." She said, the aggravation at being forced into his little scheme still apparent in her eyes.

They told Charlotte that they were leaving and then Joseph led her out to the garage. Instead of taking a limo, he took the keys out of his pocket and they went around to the back of the garage where a beat up old short-bed Ford stood. He opened the passenger door.

"Hop in." he said, barely containing his laughter at her look of total confusion. She climbed up into the pick-up truck and he slid in behind the wheel.

The truck was silent as he drove up into the mountains. About fifteen minutes later he stopped in the parking lot of a small restaurant.

"I'll be right back, please try not to get into any trouble." He said, grinning at her.

"Hmmph." Was the only response he got. Less than two minutes later he returned, with a plastic bag containing styrofoam take-out containers. Handing them to Clarisse, he put the drink in the cup-holder and got back in the truck. Clarisse put the bag on the seat beside her and slid closer to Joseph on the bench seat.

After another five minutes, the pavement ended as Joseph turned onto the narrowest dirt road that Clarisse had ever seen. It looked more like a motorcycle path than a road. She tried to hold on as the car bounced around on the road that ran straight up the mountain. As they reached the top, she let out a sigh of relief. Then she nearly screamed as Joseph began backing toward the cliff.

"Joseph, what are you doing?" she cried as the edge came closer. Suddenly, he stopped and turned the car off, and tilted his head to kiss her cheek.

"Relax, darling. That's why we're here." he said simply, then reached across her for the bag containing their dinner and got out of the truck.

"What?" she sputtered, also getting out of the car and facing him over the back of it. "you dragged me all the way out here to relax? When I have so much work that I have to do at home, you expect me to relax?"

"Yes," he said calmly, climbing into the back of the truck, and settling himself on the edge.

"But I can't, Joseph! I can't do this!" her anger gave way to the tears that had been threatening to spill over all day. Joseph quickly jumped down and pulled her tight against him.

"Darling, you don't have to. I know you can't do it all alone, that's why I'm here for you. Always. And Charlotte too. She's there to help you too, if you'd just let her." He whispered soothingly.

"Thank you," she sobbed. He held her a few more minutes until her tears subsided, then pushed her back to look at her.

"Better now?" he asked softly.

She nodded, and he smiled, kissing her lightly.

"Good. Now, my dear, dinner awaits." She smiled for the first time all day and accepted his hand as he helped her into the back of the truck. After a delicious dinner of rainbow trout and french fries, Joseph put their garbage back in the truck, and reappeared with a blanket and some cushions.

"just in time," he said indicating the sun that was setting directly across from them.

"Joseph, it's beautiful!" she said, settling against him to watch the sunset.

They watched the colors change from orange, to pink to finally a dark red as the sun set. Joseph pulled the blanket around them as he felt Clarisse shiver. She snuggled closer to him, resting her head on his shoulder.

"Are you feeling better now, darling?" he asked, as the sun finally dipped below the horizon.

"Much better. I'm so sorry, Joseph, for how I treated you earlier."

"It's all right, I understand. I know you didn't mean it. You were just stressed." He said.

Clarisse sighed. "You know me so well. What would I do without you?"

"I don't know. Let's hope we never have to find out." He told her, lifting her chin with his finger to kiss her lovingly. "We should get back. I told Shades I wouldn't keep you out too late on a weeknight." He teased gently.

"Oh, if we have to." She said, grudgingly.

Clarisse clutched his arm as they made their way back down the nerve-wracking mountain road. Once they were back on the pavement, she dozed off, her head on his shoulder.

He gently pulled her out of the car and guided her up the steps and to her suite. She dismissed Olivia and changed for bed. As he tucked her in, as one would a small child, she yawned as said, "Stay with me?"

Smiling, he kicked off his shoes and jacket, and climbed into the bed beside her. She snuggled into his embrace and began to drift off to sleep immediately. He reached over to turn off the light, and then gave her a gentle kiss goodnight.

"Love you." She murmured sleepily.

"I love you too, darling."

A/N: YAY! I got a title…stole it from an Alan Jackson song lyric though…but it isn't stealing since he's getting credit right here.


End file.
